[Even Vanitas himself can understand that sentiment, that desire to protect another from harm, despite his typical reserved and isolated nature. There's no blame to be laid for that, as he sees it. So he merely pets over Vincent's face and hair in what he hopes is a soothing manner, nodding.]
You've proven that much. [As their fight illustrated.] I'm grateful you both made it out okay, even if it wasn't an easy path to walk.
Everyone is. You were just a child when all that happened. And all you knew was that this would help Gilbert. I know how it is....to blame yourself.
[Children are generally more selfish, more prone to considering themselves and their loved ones first and foremost. It makes sense that Vincent would do that. Not that Noé has experience with having siblings. But.....well. Louis and Domi had sort of felt like it, almost. Growing up alongside them as he had. What would he have done if he had the chance to save Louis? If he could spare Domi losing him? Noé is quiet as he seems lost in thought, considering how far he might have gone. What he might have done differently.]
[ Under Vanitas’ touch, his lashes fall to rest against his cheeks, a hand curling at his chest as he considers stopping him.
Yet, Noé speaks about knowing what it is to blame oneself, and he finds himself tilting his head back to look at the other, vision taking in the detail of his face curiously. Quietly, he hums, shifting to relax as he’d been before. ]
… I hope that was sufficient enough to answer your questions.
[Despite the grim subject matter, Vanitas has to laugh, albeit wryly. Between the three of them they seem to be made up of a mountain of traumatic experiences. It's rather a wonder they manage to function at all some days. Although knowing what he does now, it's enough to cause him to reach up and stroke both blond and white hair alike.]
What a fine trio we make, hmm? And still we've all turned out very differently. I wonder if everyone drawn here has been through their own special hell...
[Perhaps it's experiences which bind them as Patho-Gen's little guinea pigs.]
[Well. Certainly, it does seem that the three of them have been through a lot. He closes one eye as Vanitas reaches and strokes his hair again, but doesn't really move to bat his hand away or protest. He isn't sure what to make of that. That it is experiences such as these Patho-Gen might exploit. That didn't sound right. OR, well. Didn't sound nice, fair. To take advantage of such.]
[ Yes, they certainly have turned out differently; a grim reminder that there is simply no excuse for Vincent to have done the things which he has. That much gets a snerk out of him, eyes closing beneath Vanitas’ touch. ]
Ah, see, there is still much about you that I don’t know, Noé. Am I correct in assuming that is why you took to my memories so harshly? Some similarity to your own past?
[ And he’ll snatch that hand off of his head quite suddenly then, untwining his fingers with that of his lover, placing a kiss to the back of their palm. ]
[And yet he couldn't blame Vincent even if he wanted to, just as he doesn't blame Noé for fighting him to protect Dominique. Doesn't mean he likes it, mind, but given Vanitas himself would've murdered Dr. Moreau if given the chance, what room does he have to judge? None, really.
With his hand removed and kissed so sweetly, Vanitas offers a small smile that wavers at Vincent's question towards his companion. He doesn't know all the details; just enough to grasp Noé has been through enough to make him passionate about helping curse-bearers. For now, he remains silent, glancing up at both men curiously.]
That’s…well, um. I mean, besides Sablier? Back before Teacher found me, I was…trafficked? Is that it? So seeing you and Gil go through that…
[He admits, quietly. He’s just barely starting to vaguely open up more to Vanitas, let alone Vincent, but. Well. He probably should try. Vanitas is important to him. Vincent is important to Vanitas. So. He should try to explain. Because it was more than his horror at seeing the destruction of Sablier. Even as he speaks, he’s a little more tense, lowering his gaze and hiding behind his mess of hair. He doesn’t want to bring up such awful memories for Vincent. If the other even really remembers it himself. Sometimes he saw memories the other he fed from had forgotten. So it could be hard to tell.]
[ Vincent’s brows tick upward with some surprise, absentmindedly running his fingers along Vanitas’ knuckles in thought. ]
Ah. I hadn’t realized you’d seen— even that. [ Mouth working into a frown, his brow knits. ] So, your teacher found you, did he… [ No, he’s not liking the sound of that at all. ] What sort of things did he teach you, hm?
[He really shouldn't be surprised the other two have had such rough childhoods as well, yet hearing it spoken of like this, knowing both Noé and Vincent went through similar things to each other is making Vanitas see them in a slightly new light. It amazes him how strong they've both turned out.]
Noé... Vince... [He clasps at Vincent's hand with his free one, holding it close to his heart as he gazes up at them both in pained wonder. It's definitely amazing anyone could go through such an experience and still come out trusting people like Noé does. Being more like himself or Vincent seems more likely.]
...Sorry. I wasn't looking for any particular memories, so. It was kind of....mm. Broad? I guess.
[He had at least been able to warn Vincent. That he could see people's memories. And had permission. Not that it makes this any easier. It's hardly something anyone would want to have in common. That knowledge and confirmation that others had been through something similar in such an experience. His lips purse, shaking his head a little.]
I was pretty young. But I still sort of remember it. It was after the rest of the Archiviste's were killed. After the human couple that took me in had died. There was a while in between then and when he found me. He recognized that I was a vampire. Took me in. Tutored me and let me play with his grandchildren - Louis and Domi.
[ As he listens, Vincent passively rubs at his lover’s chest, slow and intentional; a show of appreciation as he revels in the peace that their connection brings, his own breathing deepening with a steady rise and fall of his chest.
To Noé’s apology, he merely shakes his head to dismiss the need. Gradually, the knot of his brow would ease, too, upon realizing that the man’s teacher had apparently treated him well, despite his suspicions. ]
Do you recall what had happened to you, during your time between homes? When you were sold.
[ Asking such details shouldn’t be necessary, really, beyond… Well, perhaps, Vincent values knowledge for its own sake. It could be that he himself remembers his past - all of it - far too well, and wishes that he hadn’t. There is the possibility that he recalls what Vanitas had said, that Noé withholds this about himself. There’s the challenge to withdraw it from him, maybe even the desire to release it when he himself cannot. Maybe he wants to aid his lover in earning this familiarity that he desires. It may even be all of it. ]
[For his part, Vanitas is grateful for having both of them here; it seems that the effects of imprinting add up, leaving him truly relaxed and calm despite the subject matter being so grim. He, too, has always had reservations about Noé's teacher, if only because his companion seems to trust him without unfailingly, heeding his words without question. It worried him how obedient the vampire could be, sometimes, despite his forceful nature.]
I too, wish to know, if you can share that much.
[He reaches for Noé's hand in order to catch it and give it a reassuring squeeze. It would be amiss of him to not have some concern for his now friend/romantic partner. He'd never thought to ask these questions before, preferring to keep as much distance as possible between himself and others. Yet here, things have changed. He has these stupid imprints, which compel him into sharing more about himself, too.]
You mentioned not wishing to lose Dominique, too...
[Noé had been rather young. But he does have some vague memories of that time. Still, it isn't like he had wanted to bring up bad memories for Vincent. Even if the other shakes his head to reassure him, it's okay. That kind of experience still stays with you. Even if it's been years.]
I remember traveling a lot. Probably....like, mm, auctions? People bidding and stuff? That's when Teacher found me and took me in. I guess because he offered my kidnappers more money. But it worked out.
[Mostly. Apart from.....well. Louis. His fate. Noé bites his lower lip at Vanitas's question. Belatedly realizing that the other might have heard Mikhail mention Louis once before, but it isn't something he had discussed with Vanitas. The reason why he was so fixated on helping the curse bearers.]
Louis. Domi's twin. He was living with Teacher. Domi came to visit sometimes, but she was mostly at the de Sade mansion. So I initially spent more time with Louis. He....was a curse bearer. He asked me to kill him and I couldn't. When he was about to attack me, Teacher killed him to protect me. That's why....
[Why he had such a hard time when Vanitas had asked that of him. Why he was so determined to help the curse bearers. As if that could somehow make up for what had happened with Louis. He knows it won't. But at least, it might help spare someone else from that same fate. From losing someone dear to them like that. His fingers entwine with Vanitas's instinctively, absently rubbing the other's hand with his thumb as he speaks in response to the squeeze.]
[ Ah. Not a fate which anyone would hope for, but again, his suspicions veered far too dark. That is why he eases further, albeit the sober nod of understanding which he gives. ]
I see. Is that what you blame yourself for? Louis’ death.
[ Hands clasped over him like so, Vincent’s vision drifts from those clasped fingers, to the expressions of his companions - and m, finally, to Vanitas. There’s something that he hasn’t been told, it seems, and it leads to those mismatched eyes of his sharpening just so. ]
[Honestly, Vanitas would have - and does - have those suspicions, too. Mostly based around the hearsay surrounding Noé's rather infamous teacher. Not having a definite name to go by is one reason alone to be skeptical of the man, purchasing a child with a special, all but lost skill...? That's another.]
Your... passion-- [Obsession, really.] --for saving curse-bearers makes a great deal more sense to me now. Though I think you both blame yourselves for far too much.
[As if he has any room to talk, really. But this isn't about him and his hypocrisy right now. But it also explains why Noé refused to back down when Dominique was in danger and why they ended up fighting just before his arrival here. He's glad they cleared that up, at least. Heaving a weary sigh, he closes his eyes.]
Blame myself? I didn't realize....all that time. And when he asked me, I couldn't....
[Couldn't act. Couldn't bring himself to do as Louis had asked. Never picked up on the truth. Sure, he was a child, so much younger back then, but even so. Even when Vanitas had asked him earlier. He still couldn't do it. Maybe it was more that he sort of froze in confusion and terror at the question. At what was asked of him. Maybe it was more that he was selfish, not wanting to lose Louis. Or Vanitas.
His lips purse, and he raises one hand to clumsily wipe away the tears that threaten to fall. Noé hadn't meant to lead the conversation this direction. Doesn't want to get upset or worry either of them.]
It does? But even when you asked...I still couldn't.
[Noé is oblivious about how suspicious both of them are regarding his Teacher. Nor is he considering that Vanitas might not exactly have told Vincent much about their time they were captives. How he had asked Noé to kill him. That they had imprinted.]
[ Vanitas’ analysis earns something of a look, albeit with a smirk to accompany it.
His eyes dart to Noé, then. The man is quite alluring when he cries, Vincent thinks. Passively wetting his lips, the blond simply observes as he speaks, but once the other has quieted to sniffles, he’ll attempt to pick himself up to sit against the wall. It’s slow, and hardly graceful; he sits back with a huff, but he’s able to do it, nonetheless. ]
While I may not know the entirety of your circumstances, it would seem to me that you were the one failed. [ Brushing his hands across his slacks to right them, before his eyes turn to meet Noé’s. ] I wouldn’t place that sort of burden on my brother. While he may be capable of cruelty, I know that his heart is also too kind. It would destroy him. [ Reaching out, he’ll take some of that snowy white hair between his fingers to roll between his fingers. ] I also know that there is much which goes over his head, and it’s something of a protective measure from years of hardship. These are things which need to be considered, out of love - and neither Louis or your teacher did so. Your friend was young. Your guardian, however, had no excuse.
[With Vincent trying to sit up, he moves to help, bracing a hand against the man's shoulder so he doesn't pitch forward in case the blood rushes to his head and leaves him dizzy. Though he does have to gaze at his lover with narrowed eyes as he moistens his lips. He has a rough idea what might be going through his head and it's not altogether welcome. He might be just a tad possessive of his idiot. Just a little.
But more than that, he's worried about Noé himself. The fact he's crying so much, the pain he's going through. The fact there's nothing he can do to ease those troubles or right them, other than to continue on as they have to save people so Noé won't have to watch anyone else go through what he did. Reaching out, he touches a hand to the vampire's heart.]
Vincent's right. There was nothing you did wrong, Noé. It was more than anyone should ask of you, especially as a young child. The fact I did as well, that you still couldn't bring yourself to honor my request, it only proves you're still the kind person you were back then. That's nothing to be ashamed of. I'm grateful you made the choices you did. I think it would've been discouraging if you had killed either Louis or me. So... cry as much as you need to. But remember you're still you, and that's what's important.
[Noé is oblivious as to what Vincent might be thinking, seeing him upset like this. More, he is too sheepish to really pay too much attention when the other licks his lips. Though the movement of Vincent sitting up does get his attention, he instinctively reaches with one hand to help support him if needed. Though it seems that Vanitas is helping anyway.]
Huh? I was? But if he hadn't, then Louis might have... [Might have hurt or even killed Noé in his frenzy. Not that Noé would have blamed him if he had gotten hurt. Louis wasn't himself. What hurts more is that his friend had known this would happen all along. Had prepared for it, spending time carving out those stakes. His gaze shifts to glance at Vincent through his mess of hair, closing one eye as Vincent plays with his hair and Vanitas reaches for him, too.]
Sorry. I didn't mean...
[They had been asking Vincent about Sablier. Not all this. Still, he clumsily wipes at his face, pouting as he dampens the sleeve of his cardigan.]
[ With a hand on either shoulder, Vincent wouldn’t be able to resist chuckling. Releasing Noe’s hair, he dashes the strands back out of his face. Perhaps to man’s relief, however, the subject would change, as the blond’s attention snaps to Vanitas. ]
You did what?
[ Though with smile firmly in place, there is no patience in his eyes while gazing upon his lover. ]
[Perhaps it would've been better had they let Vincent fall over, given the look he's giving Vanitas now. While he doesn't flinch, he does grow sullen and hunch his shoulders up as he focuses first on Noé, reaching out to pet his companion again in the hopes of reassuring him.]
I know. Still, for you to have seen such a thing... Surely there was a better way it could've been handled. But it's all academic now. What's done is done. You're here. You're alive. That's what matters. You have nothing to apologize for. Not then, not now.
[To him. Because he knows for damn sure that time and time again he would have died if not for Noé. Sighing, he glances briefly at Vincent before looking away and adjusting the bow on his chest.]
...I asked him to kill me.
[Stepping off the bed, he strides forward, absently smoothing his clothes with his back to them both.]
To escape the torture. I know we aren't likely to die here - it's my belief either our souls keep us alive, or Patho-Gen has means of reviving us. So that seemed the easier choice in the moment.
[A better way. Maybe if he had met Vanitas all those years ago. If he'd been there to help Louis. Or even if Louis had been executed at a different time, without Noé being right there to see it happen in front of him. Still, Vanitas was right. All he can do is focus on what he can do from here. And he is trying to ensure that Vanitas can help other vampires.
He tenses then, as Vincent asks, opening his closed eye from Vanitas petting him as the other shifts and his violet eyes glance between the other two. Feeling like he definitely messed up and should maybe give them some space. While also feeling like he should stay to keep an eye on Vanitas. Just in case. He swallows, pursing his lips as he glances at Vincent.]
It -- it wasn't Vanitas's fault...he just wanted me to help him. But I didn't. I...couldn't.
[ Waiting for such an answer only spikes his irritation, breathing a long and quiet sigh. Arms will fold to rest along his middle, however, as he stills himself.
Noé’s attempts at reassurance do little beyond earn the attention of his mismatched eyes, but once he’s reduced to silence again, Vincent’s lashes will flutter as his vision drifts back to Vanitas. ]
… Kitten, could you come here? I’d hate to stumble after you, but I will, if I must.
[ Calmly, he’ll scoot his way to the edge of the bed, offering his palms to take. ]
[A quick glance over his shoulder at Noé, he shakes his head, dismissing the need for him to be defended. Appreciated as it is, he doesn't want to get his friend in trouble, as he feels he probably is.]
It's fine, Noé. You're not to blame. Don't worry about it one way or the other, alright?
[At Vincent's request, he whirls around, a defiant expression on his face. For a moment it seems like he won't move, but-- eventually, he does, striding back towards them in order to take Vincent's hands tightly. Though his stubborn glare remains firmly in place, daring him to scold him.]
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Date: 2025-10-26 08:04 pm (UTC)You've proven that much. [As their fight illustrated.] I'm grateful you both made it out okay, even if it wasn't an easy path to walk.
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Date: 2025-10-27 12:25 am (UTC)[Children are generally more selfish, more prone to considering themselves and their loved ones first and foremost. It makes sense that Vincent would do that. Not that Noé has experience with having siblings. But.....well. Louis and Domi had sort of felt like it, almost. Growing up alongside them as he had. What would he have done if he had the chance to save Louis? If he could spare Domi losing him? Noé is quiet as he seems lost in thought, considering how far he might have gone. What he might have done differently.]
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Date: 2025-10-27 11:31 am (UTC)Yet, Noé speaks about knowing what it is to blame oneself, and he finds himself tilting his head back to look at the other, vision taking in the detail of his face curiously. Quietly, he hums, shifting to relax as he’d been before. ]
… I hope that was sufficient enough to answer your questions.
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Date: 2025-10-27 11:40 am (UTC)What a fine trio we make, hmm? And still we've all turned out very differently. I wonder if everyone drawn here has been through their own special hell...
[Perhaps it's experiences which bind them as Patho-Gen's little guinea pigs.]
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Date: 2025-10-27 05:33 pm (UTC)[Well. Certainly, it does seem that the three of them have been through a lot. He closes one eye as Vanitas reaches and strokes his hair again, but doesn't really move to bat his hand away or protest. He isn't sure what to make of that. That it is experiences such as these Patho-Gen might exploit. That didn't sound right. OR, well. Didn't sound nice, fair. To take advantage of such.]
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Date: 2025-10-28 07:56 pm (UTC)Ah, see, there is still much about you that I don’t know, Noé. Am I correct in assuming that is why you took to my memories so harshly? Some similarity to your own past?
[ And he’ll snatch that hand off of his head quite suddenly then, untwining his fingers with that of his lover, placing a kiss to the back of their palm. ]
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Date: 2025-10-28 09:56 pm (UTC)With his hand removed and kissed so sweetly, Vanitas offers a small smile that wavers at Vincent's question towards his companion. He doesn't know all the details; just enough to grasp Noé has been through enough to make him passionate about helping curse-bearers. For now, he remains silent, glancing up at both men curiously.]
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Date: 2025-10-29 01:18 am (UTC)[He admits, quietly. He’s just barely starting to vaguely open up more to Vanitas, let alone Vincent, but. Well. He probably should try. Vanitas is important to him. Vincent is important to Vanitas. So. He should try to explain. Because it was more than his horror at seeing the destruction of Sablier. Even as he speaks, he’s a little more tense, lowering his gaze and hiding behind his mess of hair. He doesn’t want to bring up such awful memories for Vincent. If the other even really remembers it himself. Sometimes he saw memories the other he fed from had forgotten. So it could be hard to tell.]
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Date: 2025-10-29 02:33 am (UTC)Ah. I hadn’t realized you’d seen— even that. [ Mouth working into a frown, his brow knits. ] So, your teacher found you, did he… [ No, he’s not liking the sound of that at all. ] What sort of things did he teach you, hm?
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Date: 2025-10-29 06:32 am (UTC)Noé... Vince... [He clasps at Vincent's hand with his free one, holding it close to his heart as he gazes up at them both in pained wonder. It's definitely amazing anyone could go through such an experience and still come out trusting people like Noé does. Being more like himself or Vincent seems more likely.]
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Date: 2025-10-29 06:41 am (UTC)[He had at least been able to warn Vincent. That he could see people's memories. And had permission. Not that it makes this any easier. It's hardly something anyone would want to have in common. That knowledge and confirmation that others had been through something similar in such an experience. His lips purse, shaking his head a little.]
I was pretty young. But I still sort of remember it. It was after the rest of the Archiviste's were killed. After the human couple that took me in had died. There was a while in between then and when he found me. He recognized that I was a vampire. Took me in. Tutored me and let me play with his grandchildren - Louis and Domi.
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Date: 2025-10-29 07:16 pm (UTC)To Noé’s apology, he merely shakes his head to dismiss the need. Gradually, the knot of his brow would ease, too, upon realizing that the man’s teacher had apparently treated him well, despite his suspicions. ]
Do you recall what had happened to you, during your time between homes? When you were sold.
[ Asking such details shouldn’t be necessary, really, beyond… Well, perhaps, Vincent values knowledge for its own sake. It could be that he himself remembers his past - all of it - far too well, and wishes that he hadn’t. There is the possibility that he recalls what Vanitas had said, that Noé withholds this about himself. There’s the challenge to withdraw it from him, maybe even the desire to release it when he himself cannot. Maybe he wants to aid his lover in earning this familiarity that he desires. It may even be all of it. ]
Or what had happened when your Teacher found you?
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Date: 2025-10-29 11:24 pm (UTC)I too, wish to know, if you can share that much.
[He reaches for Noé's hand in order to catch it and give it a reassuring squeeze. It would be amiss of him to not have some concern for his now friend/romantic partner. He'd never thought to ask these questions before, preferring to keep as much distance as possible between himself and others. Yet here, things have changed. He has these stupid imprints, which compel him into sharing more about himself, too.]
You mentioned not wishing to lose Dominique, too...
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Date: 2025-10-30 12:17 am (UTC)I remember traveling a lot. Probably....like, mm, auctions? People bidding and stuff? That's when Teacher found me and took me in. I guess because he offered my kidnappers more money. But it worked out.
[Mostly. Apart from.....well. Louis. His fate. Noé bites his lower lip at Vanitas's question. Belatedly realizing that the other might have heard Mikhail mention Louis once before, but it isn't something he had discussed with Vanitas. The reason why he was so fixated on helping the curse bearers.]
Louis. Domi's twin. He was living with Teacher. Domi came to visit sometimes, but she was mostly at the de Sade mansion. So I initially spent more time with Louis. He....was a curse bearer. He asked me to kill him and I couldn't. When he was about to attack me, Teacher killed him to protect me. That's why....
[Why he had such a hard time when Vanitas had asked that of him. Why he was so determined to help the curse bearers. As if that could somehow make up for what had happened with Louis. He knows it won't. But at least, it might help spare someone else from that same fate. From losing someone dear to them like that. His fingers entwine with Vanitas's instinctively, absently rubbing the other's hand with his thumb as he speaks in response to the squeeze.]
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Date: 2025-10-30 02:19 am (UTC)I see. Is that what you blame yourself for? Louis’ death.
[ Hands clasped over him like so, Vincent’s vision drifts from those clasped fingers, to the expressions of his companions - and m, finally, to Vanitas. There’s something that he hasn’t been told, it seems, and it leads to those mismatched eyes of his sharpening just so. ]
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Date: 2025-10-30 04:38 am (UTC)Your... passion-- [Obsession, really.] --for saving curse-bearers makes a great deal more sense to me now. Though I think you both blame yourselves for far too much.
[As if he has any room to talk, really. But this isn't about him and his hypocrisy right now. But it also explains why Noé refused to back down when Dominique was in danger and why they ended up fighting just before his arrival here. He's glad they cleared that up, at least. Heaving a weary sigh, he closes his eyes.]
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Date: 2025-10-30 05:50 am (UTC)[Couldn't act. Couldn't bring himself to do as Louis had asked. Never picked up on the truth. Sure, he was a child, so much younger back then, but even so. Even when Vanitas had asked him earlier. He still couldn't do it. Maybe it was more that he sort of froze in confusion and terror at the question. At what was asked of him. Maybe it was more that he was selfish, not wanting to lose Louis. Or Vanitas.
His lips purse, and he raises one hand to clumsily wipe away the tears that threaten to fall. Noé hadn't meant to lead the conversation this direction. Doesn't want to get upset or worry either of them.]
It does? But even when you asked...I still couldn't.
[Noé is oblivious about how suspicious both of them are regarding his Teacher. Nor is he considering that Vanitas might not exactly have told Vincent much about their time they were captives. How he had asked Noé to kill him. That they had imprinted.]
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Date: 2025-10-30 11:30 pm (UTC)His eyes dart to Noé, then. The man is quite alluring when he cries, Vincent thinks. Passively wetting his lips, the blond simply observes as he speaks, but once the other has quieted to sniffles, he’ll attempt to pick himself up to sit against the wall. It’s slow, and hardly graceful; he sits back with a huff, but he’s able to do it, nonetheless. ]
While I may not know the entirety of your circumstances, it would seem to me that you were the one failed. [ Brushing his hands across his slacks to right them, before his eyes turn to meet Noé’s. ] I wouldn’t place that sort of burden on my brother. While he may be capable of cruelty, I know that his heart is also too kind. It would destroy him. [ Reaching out, he’ll take some of that snowy white hair between his fingers to roll between his fingers. ] I also know that there is much which goes over his head, and it’s something of a protective measure from years of hardship. These are things which need to be considered, out of love - and neither Louis or your teacher did so. Your friend was young. Your guardian, however, had no excuse.
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Date: 2025-10-31 12:07 am (UTC)But more than that, he's worried about Noé himself. The fact he's crying so much, the pain he's going through. The fact there's nothing he can do to ease those troubles or right them, other than to continue on as they have to save people so Noé won't have to watch anyone else go through what he did. Reaching out, he touches a hand to the vampire's heart.]
Vincent's right. There was nothing you did wrong, Noé. It was more than anyone should ask of you, especially as a young child. The fact I did as well, that you still couldn't bring yourself to honor my request, it only proves you're still the kind person you were back then. That's nothing to be ashamed of. I'm grateful you made the choices you did. I think it would've been discouraging if you had killed either Louis or me. So... cry as much as you need to. But remember you're still you, and that's what's important.
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Date: 2025-10-31 12:41 am (UTC)Huh? I was? But if he hadn't, then Louis might have... [Might have hurt or even killed Noé in his frenzy. Not that Noé would have blamed him if he had gotten hurt. Louis wasn't himself. What hurts more is that his friend had known this would happen all along. Had prepared for it, spending time carving out those stakes. His gaze shifts to glance at Vincent through his mess of hair, closing one eye as Vincent plays with his hair and Vanitas reaches for him, too.]
Sorry. I didn't mean...
[They had been asking Vincent about Sablier. Not all this. Still, he clumsily wipes at his face, pouting as he dampens the sleeve of his cardigan.]
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Date: 2025-10-31 01:43 am (UTC)You did what?
[ Though with smile firmly in place, there is no patience in his eyes while gazing upon his lover. ]
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Date: 2025-10-31 01:57 am (UTC)I know. Still, for you to have seen such a thing... Surely there was a better way it could've been handled. But it's all academic now. What's done is done. You're here. You're alive. That's what matters. You have nothing to apologize for. Not then, not now.
[To him. Because he knows for damn sure that time and time again he would have died if not for Noé. Sighing, he glances briefly at Vincent before looking away and adjusting the bow on his chest.]
...I asked him to kill me.
[Stepping off the bed, he strides forward, absently smoothing his clothes with his back to them both.]
To escape the torture. I know we aren't likely to die here - it's my belief either our souls keep us alive, or Patho-Gen has means of reviving us. So that seemed the easier choice in the moment.
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Date: 2025-10-31 02:19 am (UTC)[A better way. Maybe if he had met Vanitas all those years ago. If he'd been there to help Louis. Or even if Louis had been executed at a different time, without Noé being right there to see it happen in front of him. Still, Vanitas was right. All he can do is focus on what he can do from here. And he is trying to ensure that Vanitas can help other vampires.
He tenses then, as Vincent asks, opening his closed eye from Vanitas petting him as the other shifts and his violet eyes glance between the other two. Feeling like he definitely messed up and should maybe give them some space. While also feeling like he should stay to keep an eye on Vanitas. Just in case. He swallows, pursing his lips as he glances at Vincent.]
It -- it wasn't Vanitas's fault...he just wanted me to help him. But I didn't. I...couldn't.
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Date: 2025-10-31 02:28 am (UTC)Noé’s attempts at reassurance do little beyond earn the attention of his mismatched eyes, but once he’s reduced to silence again, Vincent’s lashes will flutter as his vision drifts back to Vanitas. ]
… Kitten, could you come here? I’d hate to stumble after you, but I will, if I must.
[ Calmly, he’ll scoot his way to the edge of the bed, offering his palms to take. ]
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Date: 2025-10-31 02:41 am (UTC)It's fine, Noé. You're not to blame. Don't worry about it one way or the other, alright?
[At Vincent's request, he whirls around, a defiant expression on his face. For a moment it seems like he won't move, but-- eventually, he does, striding back towards them in order to take Vincent's hands tightly. Though his stubborn glare remains firmly in place, daring him to scold him.]
I don't need a lecture.
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